Not the same old stories

Desktop with Blank Paper and PencilIt is a fact of life that every now and then we are obliged to visit our older relatives and in-laws. We may love these people very much and yet we quite often look forward to these visits with annoyance, if not actual dread. To have to listen to the same old stories yet again seems almost unbearable.At the same time we may regret that we didn’t get more information from our grandparents and other relatives who have passed away. Why did they never tell us about their childhoods or when they got married? Perhaps we never asked!

I’m sure you can see where I’m going with this. Don’t be content to listen to the same stories of your living relatives, but ask them for more information before it’s too late. When they tell you the same story about what somebody else did then don’t just nod sympathetically but ask for more information:

  • What did you say or do?
  • Why do you think he did that?
  • What happened next?
  • What did _________ think/say/do?
  • Did that happen often?
  • What was the usual custom?

I’m sure you can think of other examples, depending on the situation. Think of a story right now that usually comes out during a visit and think up some relevant questions. If you use them you may be surprised at what new information comes out.

You can also be more systematic in your approach. Instead of waiting for the old stories to come out, you can ask for new ones. Be prepared before you get there with specific questions to ask, depending on your interest and theirs.

A few questions to ask family members could include:

Growing Up

  • Where did you grow up?
  • What was your school like?
  • What did you do after school?
  • What did you do in the school holidays?

Family Members

  • Describe the personalities of your family members.
  • Are there any physical characteristics that run in your family?
  • How well did you get on with each of your siblings?
  • Who was your favourite grandparent/aunt/uncle/brother/sister?
  • Who was your least favourite grandparent/aunt/uncle/brother/sister?

Family Traditions

  • Can you remember any stories that were told to you as a child (fictional, folklore, or real life)?
  • Did your family have any memorable holiday or other traditions?
  • What did your mother cook for special occasions?

Special Interests / Hobbies

  • Did you have any hobbies when you were growing up?
  • What kind of games did you play?
  • what did you do instead of watching TV?

Courtship / Dating / Marriage

  • Where did you meet your husband/wife?
  • How did he / you propose?
  • Did your parents approve? Did his/hers?

You could write down the answers (before you forget) or even record the whole thing. A PDA or MP3 player may be able to record voices, or a voice recorder. A video camera would be even better; even the one in your new digital camera or mobile phone would be better than nothing. The results would be a priceless record of the history of your family. Explain what you are doing and why, and ask permission first.

You could transcribe the interview (because that’s what it will be) when you get home and distribute copies to interested siblings and other relatives. You could burn the voice or video recordings to CD or DVD and distribute these as well.

Don’t just do it the once. Make it a regular thing if your relative is willing. He/she may enjoy telling different stories, and you will certainly enjoy hearing them. These visits can be a fantastic opportunity to get some information out of your relatives; don’t waste them!

Source for questions: Survey Reveals Americans’ Surprising Lack of Family Knowledge, 24-7 Family History Circle, Ancestry.com, 7 Dec 2007.

How to start your family tree

dreamstimefree_5017179_320x240Over the next few posts I will be going back to basics. I will be explaining how to build your family tree from the beginning. My focus will be on New South Wales records but the principles can be applied anywhere.

What is it for?

First, you need to decide what you want to get out of it. What is your goal? There are many reasons for starting research into your family history, such as

  • to find out whether you really are related to Charles Dickens or Mary Queen of Scots
  • to find out whether great-great-grandfather really was a sea-captain
  • to see how far back you can go
  • to build an ancestral chart for your children
  • to find out what your ancestors were like and understand their lives better

What you want to get out of it will determine how you go about it. It will also help you to know when you get there! You may stop when you discover that there is no link between you and Charles Dickens, or you may become inspired to keep going and find out about your own family history – the heroes and villains and interesting characters. The goal may change over time and that’s OK, but it is still important to know what it is.

Start with what you know

Whatever your reasons, and whatever your goals, you must start with what you know. Everyone says this to you, and it sounds very boring, but it’s true. It’s no good tracing the descendants of Charles Dickens hoping that you will eventually find the link to your own family. It never works. You have to start with accurate information and this necessarily means that you must start with your own parents and grandparents and work backwards in time, up the tree.

Talk to your parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles and find out what they know, or think they know. Record everything, and make sure you record who told you.

Collect all the documents, photographs and other pieces of paper that you can find from your relatives. Old birth, baptism, marriage and death certificates; newspaper cuttings; school reports; old charts and reports from the previous research of relatives; anything and everything may be useful.

You can then start to look at these bits and pieces more thoroughly and decide for yourself which can be trusted and which may just give ideas for further research. A hand-drawn chart with names, dates and places might be very interesting and even disappointing if you think that it’s all been done already, but unless the chart has sources that can be verified then it is just a starting point and not the end result.

Recording information

You will need some sort of method for recording information and keeping track of it. Most of us these days use some sort of computer software, and if you are reading this you are familiar enough with computers to not be daunted by this.

If you don’t already have a family tree program, try one or more of the free ones first. Here are a couple of examples:

Personal Ancestral File is the most commonly used, and possibly the best, of the free programs. Published by the Mormon church.

Brother’s Keeper is shareware for Windows only. Cyndi’s List has many more examples.

Many other programs have a free trial version that you can use for 30 days to see if you like it before you buy it. Some no longer work after the 30 days without entering your registration code, which you will be sent once you’ve paid, and others allow continued use with reduced features. It’s worth looking around for a program that suits you and your goals – you’ll be spending a lot of time with it!

Test each program by entering a few people and compare how easy they are to use and whether you like the way information is displayed. Consider the features you think you will need – there is no point paying extra for them if you won’t use them, and you won’t use them if they look too complicated. Don’t pay for 27 different types of charts in 101 colours if you will only ever print simple ones in black and white.

Sources

Once you find a program you like enter everything you have, and make sure you enter the sources of your information. Sources are incredibly important and often overlooked by new family tree climbers. Eventually you will get conflicting information and you will need to know where each piece of information came from so that you can determine which piece is more reliable. A date that your Aunty Mabel told you may be less (or more!) reliable than the date on a birth certificate, but you won’t know which one to use if you don’t know where each one came from.

You may think now that you’ll remember who told you what and who gave you each photograph and piece of paper but in a few months or a few years you’ll lose track. We all do. Neither will you be able to tell someone who asks where the information came from. Your research will not be convincing to anyone else unless you can show where your information came from.

This will not be the last time I will be talking about sources – they are crucial!

Backing up

Back up your computer. This is another thing that people neglect until it is too late and then it is a catastrophe. Don’t risk all your hard work being lost when your computer dies (and they all do, eventually). Back up your important files and keep the copies physically separate from your computer. You can use a flash drive, rewritable CDs or DVDs or an external hard drive. Online backup systems are becoming more popular and can be very reassuring if you find a good one. I use Mozy, but there are many others, with differing costs.

You can also upload your family tree to a website such as Ancestry or Rootsweb to make it available to other researchers. This has the added advantage of acting as a backup if something catastrophic happens to your files, your computer, or your house as many of these sites allow you to download the whole file back to your computer.

Filing

You will also need some sort of filing system so that you can find that piece of paper again when you need it. Tossing it all into a box is a sure way to frustration and possible disaster. Use ring-binders and sheet protectors, or a filing cabinet, or scan all the documents and keep them filed on your computer. Make sure that you use acid-free mounts and protectors for original photographs and documents so that they do not deteriorate further, and label everything with as much information as you can – who is involved (especially for photographs), where it came from and who gave it to you.

Documents are harder to back up but not impossible. Scanning them means that a digital copy will hopefully be backed up with your family tree. Distributing copies to interested relatives is a good way of ensuring that the documents are backed up. You could also donate a copy of your research to a genealogical society such as The Society of Australian Genealogists.

What’s next?

Most of what we have covered today is preparation for the real work of research. That’s where the fun really is. We will start talking about research in the next post – what to look for and where to find it.

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